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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Therapy

Buddy saw a therapist for about 6 months, starting a few months after we got home. When she decided to move on from her practice, she was not able to continue with Buddy's therapy. Things had been going really well at home, so we thought we would take a break and re-assess in a few months.

And then we had a bad day. A very bad day. Maybe one of the worst days. We had been told by multiple child professionals that if we have a day like that to contact a children's emergency hotline. So we did, and that was actually a great experience.

One of the things that came from the call was being fast tracked to a new therapist who specializes in hurt children. He said one option was play therapy for Buddy, but that sometimes it makes more sense to "fix the foundation than spackle the walls." Meaning maybe we needed to stop focusing on Buddy and start focusing on ourselves.

I was a bit offended at first, but after Hubby and I talked about it we realized that he was right. We were open to anything and everything to help Buddy. So once a month Hubby and I get together with this very wise and insightful man in an office at the top floor of an old house (with no elevator or air conditioning) and talk about all our feelings and stresses and relationships.

We have already learned so much about how to create a more nurturing environment for Buddy in our home. It also really helps to vent to an impartial third party who can offer constrictive advice and another perspective.

Basically, it's awesome and I highly recommend that any adoptive parents who are having even minor struggles with their adoptive children reach out for professional help for themselves.

1 comment:

  1. To work, it may be beyond our control to change the inner workings of our children but we can, hopefully, change ourselves.

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