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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Twilight Zone Dream

Buddy had a very strange dream.

He was at school and was faced with the choice to either continue on with his life as it was or to enter an egg-like device that would place him in suspended animation for 1000 years. As his classmates entered their own "eggs," he had to decide what to do. At this point he woke up, probably because "you always wake up at the worst part of your dream".

This sounds like an episode from The Twilight Zone to me. A bit out there, but not particularly scary. But to Buddy, it was an impossible situation. He told me he was so overwhelmed and stressed by the choice that in the dream he was crying.

I asked Buddy what he would pick and he said, if he had the choice, he would rather live his life straight through for almost 100 years than sleep for 1000 years and wake up and maybe not remember anything.

He moved on to another topic, but afterwards the dream stayed on my mind.

I am not a believer in the significance of dreams, but it felt like there was something to this one. I looked into it a bit and found one scientific publication from 2003 that concluded that it is possible that dreams function in part to help people cope with trauma or stressful events.

After we had been home for about 10 months, Buddy told me that when he met us he didn't really want to be adopted. If he could have chosen, he would have gone back to his birth mother. Buddy knew this wasn't an option for him, though, and he had seen many friends be adopted during his time at the orphanage. When we asked him to join our family he decided to say yes.

He had to make a choice of leaving everything behind and moving across the world to be a part of our family. If he could have, he would have chosen to keep his old life instead. He acted so strong, confident and brave. He has told me since that he was nervous when he decided to be adopted, and that means he was terrified.

What a terrible decision for a little boy to have to make.

To me, his dream seems connected to this experience.

Or maybe it was just a random, weird dream brought on by cold medicine. I guess there is no way to know for sure.

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