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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Crying it Out

Buddy is a rough and tumble boy. He doesn't like to come across as weak or, heaven forbid, "girly." He doesn't like people to know when he is hurt or to see him cry. It's kind of interesting, because he cries fairly often, he just prefers to do it in private. He definitely doesn't like to be comforted, maybe because that acknowledges the fact that he's crying.

Buddy demonstrating Swar carrying technique
The other day I asked Buddy to put Swar outside. Swar is 14 and has little, stubby, arthritic legs, so he can't get up and down the stairs to the backyard on his own anymore. He would choose to do his business in the house to avoid the cold, but will grudgingly allow us to carry him like a baby out into the yard.

Buddy scooped Swar out of his dog-bed and started towards the backdoor. I am not entirely sure what happened next, but I watched as Buddy went from walking to tripping to falling. Swar bumped his head on our dinning room table base and Buddy smacked his shoulder into a chair.

I rushed over to Buddy, who was already picking himself off the ground holding his shoulder with tears in his eyes. I can't blame him, it looked like it really hurt. I asked if he was OK, which he said he was, then I wrapped my arms around him, rested my head on his, and gave him a big bear hug.

At first he just stood there. Buddy loves to cuddle, but only when he is in a good mood. When he is upset he has a tendency to withdraw. I figured it would be more of the same, but I wanted him to know that I was there for him.

After a couple of seconds, he started to sniffle. Then he started to cry, Then he wrapped his arms around me and hugged me back. We stayed like that for a couple of long minutes. I wasn't going to be the first one to let go! So we stood there hugging, him crying and me beaming. What a weird pair we must have made.

In the mean time, Swar stood beside us grumbling and grunting. He finally gave up his complaining, shook his head a few times, and went back to his dog-bed. He didn't want to go outside in the first place.

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