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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Positively Tired

Some scientific studies have shown that negative thoughts close your mind off and prevent you from seeing options and choices. Positive thoughts do the opposite. They broaden your sense of possibility and open your mind up to more options. Our brains then build on the positive emotions, giving us resources to draw on in the future and increase our coping mechanisms. 

The first year post-adoption was a difficult for our whole family and some days were pretty dark. Looking at the glass half-empty became the norm for me, but I decided to make a change. I have been working really hard over the last month or so to be more positive.

You know what? I am positively tired of trying to be positive.

I am tired of being patient when Buddy's attempts to argue, reason and debate his way out of things he doesn't want to do. I am tired of remaining calm when he turns to whining and complaining incessantly when that doesn't work.  I am tired of trying to understand what comes after that: shutting down, self-hurt, destruction. I am tired of praising him for the little things and trying to find good in the things that are just plain bad.

That doesn't mean that I'm done trying, though.

6 comments:

  1. The great things you are giving is loving attention. When Ella and I lived in the Children's Home we got large doses of total indifference and that is mind-blowingly demotivating!

    http://livingworldsedge.blogspot.co.uk/2015/02/not-content-with-writing-one-book-now.html

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    1. Thanks for that, it means a lot to me to hear from those who have walked in my son's shoes.

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  2. I did have to laugh a little with your line "You know what? I am positively tired of trying to be positive." only because I've so been there. It is sooo hard to maintain. It's ok that some days you find it difficult. Be kind to yourself and believe that tomorrow is a new day.

    Thanks for sharing on #WASO

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    1. It's so true, thank goodness for fresh starts!

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