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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Saturday, September 27, 2014


Buddy does not like rules. We aren't particularly strict, but we do have an allowance board where we keep track of his "jobs" and he is compensated for good work. But he is used to an environment with little to no rules. He is used to chaos.

Now that he is feeling more comfortable, he is questioning the rules. He doesn't understand how they are for his benefit. He honestly thinks that everything would be better if he never had to shower, could go to bed whenever he wanted and only did homework when the mood struck him.

Buddy's allowance board

Buddy has said to us, on more than one occasion:
- "If there were no rules for me, nothing bad would happen."
- "Grow-ups have no rules and they make all the rules for kids."
- "My friends told me if I was adopted I would have lots of rules."
- "Families here have way more rules then in my birth country."

It's a tough one. We see that when there is a lack of structure he has a hard time coping. He actually does much better outside our home when we set rules and guidelines and enforce them in our day-to-day life. But there is no reasoning with Buddy once he is set on an idea. We just have to keep being consistent, set reasonable rules and hope that he will come around.

Do you have any suggestions on how to make "rules" more appealing to Buddy? Let me know!

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