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I'm a 30-something wife and mom. My boys are my pride and joy. Together, we are navigating being a forever family post international adoption.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Sleepover at Grandma Bear's

Buddy loves my little brother. He is very close with his whole adoptive family, to our pleasant surprise, but it is Uncle Bear who stole his heart. My brother is 6'4"+, but deep down he is a kid who loves to play video games, eat junk food and goof around. He is a little boy's dream come true.

Once a month, Hubby and I have a date night and Buddy spends the night at Grandma Bear's house. Usually my brother stays over so he can give my Mom a hand. We pick Buddy up the next day around lunch time.

Buddy and Uncle Bear in their natural habitat
Grandma's house is more relaxed than ours. There isn't as much importance placed on proper eating (pizza pops for breakfast, sure!), acceptable screen time (4 hours straight in front of the TV, no prob!) and homework (5 minutes of flashcards and skip everything else, why not?!?). And before you tell me "That's what grandparents are for," let me remind you that Buddy is not an average kid born and raised in a typical environment.

At Buddy's last sleepover, my Mom put him to bed at his regular bed time. At 2 AM, Buddy got up, snuck to the den and stayed up all night playing video games unsupervised. He even accepted an invitation to play an online multi-player game, which is strictly verboten and he knows it. He was pretty impressed with himself the next day and it was all he could talk about to anyone who would listen. Including strangers at Starbucks. He was also insistent that Uncle Bear woke him up and invited him to play video games, which my brother swears (and I know) isn't true.

At the core of things, I am disappointed in Buddy for taking advantage of my Mom and brother. And then for throwing my brother, whom he adores, under the bus. They love him so much and want to give him the world on a string. I wish that they were able to do that, but Buddy is not ready for such freedom. If he is given an inch he will take a mile.

Because of this, I had to have a conversation with my family. I think they better understand now the reason that we have so many "rules" for Buddy, even though he seems so "normal" and "happy".

I am hopefully things will go differently next time, because I am not ready to throw in the towel on date night just yet!

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